Attention Everyone: Trump’s Run for President Is A Hoax
Submitted by: timeghost⚫ 1 year ago
Donald Trump, the leading candidate for the Republican nomination for President of the United States, is riding high after a major (though not total) win on Super Tuesday. Like many thinking people in this country, I am trying, to make sense of how this obnoxious, abrasive, mega-wealthy son of a Klan member could have possibly conned enough of the American public into giving him this victory.
Could the reason have some relationship to the title of this blog?
Yeah, safe bet.
I am, however, not alone in my puzzlement. Even the power brokers of the GOP stand by, aghast, watching what could conceivably be the end of the Party as they have known it since those glory days of Ronald Reagan singlehandedly bringing down the Communist menace. (With a little help from a floundering Soviet economy and a Russian graveyard called Afghanistan.) Just recently Mitt Romney labeled Trump “a phony, a fraud” and “a con-artist”. Even the Prince of Darkness, Karl Rove, the evil genius behind George W’s two White House wins, believes a Trump nomination would be a catastrophe for the Party. Two men who are arguably the most reactionary conservatives in the GOP, Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, are poor runners-up to a man who, only a few years ago, was chumming around with Bill and Hillary and considered by most to be at least a nominal Democrat.
If we look at Trump with an objective eye, and a dose of Dramamine, however, we have to admit that we see a successful entrepreneur whom, although intensely dislikable in numerous ways, we must assume to have at least a modicum of intelligence. At a minimum, he has maintained the substantial pile of cash he inherited from his millionaire Dad and despite a good number of crash-and-burn business ventures, even stacked a sizable amount of his own moola onto that mound. Also, occasionally, it must be said that he does make a statement or two that seem to land outside of his padded cell. My two personal favorites are:
“(In) the real world …. You get paid what you are worth only when the person you are dealing with has no other choice.”
“I play to people’s fantasies. People may not always think big themselves, but they can still get very excited by those who do. That’s why a little hyperbole never hurts.”
If we accept the existence of this hidden alter ego: a moderately smart and rational businessman compared to the foaming-at-the-mouth megalomaniac we glimpse on the evening news, the question that begs answering is: Where is all the whacko stuff coming from? Does he really believe all he says? The guy refused to denounce an endorsement by David Duke and the KKK, something about politically astute as saying “Hitler wasn’t all bad.” He demeaned Senator John McCain’s service to his country, claiming that “He’s a war hero because he was captured. I like people that weren’t captured.” And let’s not forget that south-o-the-border wall that he plans on making Mexico pay for, folks. Considering these and other outrageous statements and actions coming from “The Donald”, could something other than his ostensible run for the White House be transpiring here?
I can see only one plausible explanation… It’s all a gigantic hoax! Billionaire Donald “Yer Fired” Trump is in the process of proving himself to be the greatest political prankster in American history!
What could be the reason of this elaborate and expensive fraud? Let’s spin the wheel and see where it lands.
1. Donald Trump turns out to be the greatest philanthropist in American history! This is all being done so he can have a teachable moment with that simpler part of the American public that adores him. His saintly and edifying message will be “Don’t vote based on the rage swelling in your angry little monkey hearts, my children. Use your eyes to see reality, your ears to hear the true meaning of the spoken words, and your mind to help you through the pasture of platitudes and cow-pies, toward the best choice for POTUS you can make.” So sayeth the Donald.
2. This is all a plot led by Republican Party elders, who, from their dark subterranean lair have secretly allied themselves with the Donald in this mammoth farce. On the day of nomination, on the floor of the Republican National Convention, Trump will mount the podium and, in one great sweeping gesture, will remove his life-like Donald Trump mask and reveal that he’s actually been Mitt Romney all along! The real Donald will come out; the two men will high five and everyone in America, with the exception of the tinfoil-hat-nut-jobs that have backed him all along, will breathe a major sigh of relief and hand Romney the biggest victory that the GOP has ever known.
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Timeghost is an educator who teaches Government, Economics, History and Philosophy in an urban high school. Though he does not claim to have definitive answers to the question "Why is America so stupid?" this blog intends to be devoted to examining various aspects of this important query, as well as all of its political, educational and social ramifications. Mr. Stowell takes full responsibility for any thoughts that appear here.